y cant i??

i was chatting with honey nw... but my mine was thinking of smth else.. i was thinking of him.. i really 1 to forget him.. but i dk the reason y i love him even deeper.. i love him even deeper than i wad i had thought i always act lyk im vr happy n lively.. act tat i can go on vr well without him.. but no1 noe tat my heart was broken.. i say i will for get him but i could not make it.. nw then i noe, say is easier but so hard to do make it.. m i the most stupid gal in the world???i noe vr well tat we r imposible to be together but i still cant let it go.. i noe vr well tat i have 0% to be with him but i still dream to be with him.. i really really vr stubborn n stupid.. if time turn bk i think i will still choose to love him.. maybe love even deper than nw

feeling down

i was alone in the room nw.. suddenly my mind started to think of u while i was staring at the beautiful sky.. the cloud was so white n it mixed with light blue.. making my heart feel warm.. i really vr tired of living in a life tat without u.. it really vr terrible. it lyk leading me to hell.. the day was seem vr long to me without u in my life.. the smile appear lesser on my face but those hot tears lyk burning deeply in my eyes.. making me could not hold bk my tears.. finally, it rolling down on my cheek juz lyk how the rain is fall u juz lyk my guardian angel tat leading me to somewhere tat is safe.. u was gently guide me with a warm n loving hands tat are strong n steady.. giving my filled with dream n hope.. u make my life more meaningful.. i hope u will walk closer n closer to my side.. my fate is to love u n care for u but my fate is could not be with u.. i thought tat time could make me forget u but it did'nt.. it prove how much i've love u n care for u.. n wan u to stay at my side.. i noe no matter wad i do, u not going to turn bk to my life but at least i put in my heart n soul, even my effort to making u to turn bk to my life.. but i still hope tat in 1 day u going to bring my happiness my smile n my laughter bk.. take away those painful memmories n suffering tat i have.. no matter wad u still the 1 tat i love the most.. i really tried my best to let u go but my heart n my mind coult not let u go.. but trust me wadeva i do nw will touch ur heart 1 day.. i dun care how long must i wait.. but i noe the day will cum.. wait for the day tat u going to bring the clear blue sky into my life.. chase away those dark clouds around me..

the feeling

suddenly i have a vr uncountable feeling cumming frm bottom of my heart... hot tears is burning my eyes... i could not control it so juz let it to rolling down on my cheek... wonder wad happen to me.. y all of the sudden i had tis kind of feeling.. jus then i think of wad i had promised him.. i noe vr well tat i will going to break the promised tat i had make... but i get force to promise it... i really wan to keep my promised tat i have make to u... but it really hard to keep the promised coz i could not forget u.. dun force me to forget u n give up in u... coz u r my only hope in tis world... pls dun stoping me frm loving u... coz i noe i could not make it... really vr sry to say tat... but make me being so lost in tis society.. leaving me alone wit the hope tat continue to love u...

pic tat we going out today

kaiting and kah hui

mie and my partner angeline

is behind us :)

kaiting help us to tok

tis pic...

joey and mie...

joey and angeline....

both of them hair messy

kaiting n angeline...

they both are partner

we both are partner.

mie n kah hui

tis pair is partner....

jia yi and joey

kaiting and joey...

all of us in the pic.. ^^

all of us in the pic.... kaiting is not in the pic... she

is taking the foto... joey help us take tis pic so she

is not in the pic :)

kahhui n i taking pic in

the class while mr peh is

taking smth in the staffroom

zul is my background

all of them hair is so messy...

im the 1 who taking tis pic <3

finally

finally psle is over... it all over after a long tired period of hard work is paid off... it time to relax nw... wakakakakaka....

i started to write tis post at 12.22 i was chatting with jeremy while i was writing tis post. feeling very tired after a long boring day. i could not concentrate during my tuition lesson. i was counting how long i will take to forget u totally. guess wad?! it has been 42 days without u. every of those day was seem very long to me. it long till i could even take my time to count every min or sec. i feel vr lonely in every nite. noe-ing tat u will not belong to me forever. my tears were flow as a tap of water hoping u will turn the tap off. but i noe u will not be the 1 to off the tap of my tears. i noe every thing is all my fault. it all my fault. i brought sad n terrible day to ur life n even my frenz. really sorry. i changed myself bcoz of u even thought i noe vr clear tat im happy to being myself. but so wad i was happy to being myself to live in a life without u. but when i noe-ing tat i forever cannot to be with u. then i realised no matter how much i changed to u i still a gangster gal. heart pain n tears wasted. i really vr tired to live in a life lyk tis. i really vr scared to face u. idk the reason y i could not b strong to give up u. i dun dare to face u but i only dare to look at u when u were nv notice.. i really vr tired. hoping some1 will take away all my sadness tat keep so long n so deep in my heart.

HATE

I hate where i cum from. None of them r understand me. They does not put themself in my shoe, then they will noe wad my feeling was. My life was filled with tears juz coz of u. Every day tears could stop not rolling down on my cheek. Thinking y i was born in tis kind of family. Pls dun force me any more. If u continue to force me tis way i will gone crazy vr soon. I rather die than stay in tis earth. I really vr tired to continue to live in tis world. Y the 1 who really understand me not my family members. The 1 tat really understand my feeling is my frenz. They do understand how i feel. I face the music every day. Sometimes i oso dunno the reason y i get scolded. I still keep it in my heart till today i dun even noe if they really care for me. I was the 1 who improve in every subject but oso the 1 who get scolded every day. my guardian say tat my result r terrible n it getting frm bad to worst. Then, my sis is the 1 who drop in every subject but i did not get scolded. Nw then i noe tat tis society is really very unfair. My dream is to leave tis house as fast as possible. If i have enough money i will left tis home sweet home immediately. I no need to face the music every day n no 1 will force me to study any more. I have tried my best, put in all my heart n soul in study but i still get scolded. They scolded me instead of giving me encouraging. I nw gif up in my study n my family. But there were some things tat i will nv ever gif up. It is my frenz n my lover. My frenz were the 1 giving me a lot encourage. Idk the reason y i must born in such an unfair family. Every nite i sleep so late. I sleep at 3+ or even not sleep to revising my work. I feel vr sleepy in sku. But when i reached home frm sku i wanna take a nap to get bk my energyfor studying ltr at nite. 2 days i could only sleep 4 hours but still get scolded. They force me to study n could not sleep at till psle is over. They say sentences tat make me hate the a lot. They said " It only 1 more week to psle. 1 week nv sleep will not take away ur life." Those sentences make me feel vr pain deeply inside my heart. They force me to study n study. I think b4 psle i aldr gone crazy. They expected me to study 22 hours per day n get A* for all 3 subject. I feel vr stress nw. I feel tat i wanna end my life by today. Tat could make me end all my stress, pain n suffering in my heart. I really lyk sku day vr much. I can hang out with my frenz. They help me to forget all my stress n i was vr happy when i were with them.