the truth is always painful

if the person lie to me i will hurt when

i find out the truth.. but if the person

telling the truth it maybe more hurt..

i really dunno wad to do nw.. is love

always lyk tat?? y i always stuck in

the middle of the word "LOVE" ??

i have enough of pain which caused

by love.. wad is the true meaning of

love?? it is all my fault.. who ever

love me will always end up with pain..

it me!!! it all my fault.. y m i so heartless..

i dunno wad to to.. im a evil lady... sorry

i have hurt u.. really sorry.. i will pay

u back by my blood..

i really vr tired of tis life.. my life is really vr annoying i was so naive tat i blieve in u.. i tot u will really cum bk to my side.. i gif u chance to prove to me tat u've change change to bcum better n u'll b a gd daddy.. but u didn't u keep on make me feel sad n disappointed.. i hate her.. hate ur new gf.. i mean my future step mother.. so i only wan u to choose either me or her.. sry to say tat.. i noe im vr selfish gal.. but if u chose her tat mean u not my daddy anymore..

y all tis must happen to me.. my cousin lyk me.. which is the fact tat i really could not accept.. i could not believe it he making me feel so confuse n dunno wad to do nw.. tired of all tis.. i hope he lyk me juz for fun so tat he wont get hurt coz i alrd has a bf.. so sad sia T.T

miss u

every nite i cannot stop

thinking of u..as ur figure

keep on cuming out frm

my mind.. our memmory

juz lyk ytd.. i still rmb the

time on bus which u keep

me so warm with ur jacket

n it burn my heart.. making

me cannot stop thinking of u

really wish time could turn

bk n making the time longer

so i can sit bside u feel ur heart

beat n ur love...

my b'day

ytd is my b'day n i celebrate at home with lot of ppl.. the party is dam fun.. i tak pic, video... we all dancing n sin- ging lyk mad... we go karaoke singing.. it lyk a unforgetable b'day ever :) YEAH!!!!

i hate...

i hate u, daddy.. u did not do

wad u supposed to do T.T ...

u making me feel so sad.. as

u promised me to bring me to

somewhere on friday but u did

not make it n promised me the

nx day.. the nx day cum u still

didnt make it n promised few

days ltr but u asked some1 to

take me out.. as i was so naive

tat i believe in u... but nw no more

really sry to say tat... u used

money to say out tat u love me..

pls i didnt wan all tat.. i really

love u wif my heart but tis is wad

u repaying me.. making feeling so

pain.. dun worry i will gif u bk those

money tat u giving me.. i didnt wan

ur money..

the swear to u (h)

i swear once to myself tat i'll

love u wit my whole hear.. my

love to u lyk the shiny star n

moon in the sky.. i hope our

love will remain till when we

r old.. i scare u cannot stand

my attitude n leave me forever

when u not here with me.. i was

missed u thousand times.. nw

a days love is not lyk olden story

wad to do to make u happy??

wad to do to make u not to be

sad?? i dun wan u to be sad..

my tears rolling n my eyes is

burning but my heart still cant

stop thinking of u.. i thought tat

when i cry the pain will heal n

i'll missed u lesser but it didn't..

i need to wait till the nx day for

the sun to set to help me clear

of the cold n wind nite..

wad to do??

my dad was so gd to me but

some times i still feel tat he

is a stranger n not dare to go

near him.. but mw feel better

when he was by my side.. he

is some1 tat i waiting for years

i was very happy when my dad

is here, by my side but some

times i feel so sad coz i missed

husain dam lot.. really wish he

will be by my side now.. i can

stay ny his side n go wherever

he go.. follow closely behind him

really dunno y cant stop think

of him sia.. i noe very well tat

i wont be a gd gf but then i still

cum around, into his life n hurt

his heart.. i was the most selfish

gal sia.. but seriously i missed n

love him nw.. miss the most is

the time we in the bus bk to sku

frm malacca.. the sweet n caring

moment tat he had giving me..

tat is when he had touch my heart

miss the sweetest moment, miss

him even more.. -.-

dream cum true

finally 1 of my dream has cum true.. guess wad happening??? i finally see my daddy.. i was so happy when i 1st see him.. happy till all the words tat i wanna say is stuck in my heart.. he was totally different frm dream.. even though i say tat i hate him but in my heart i alrd forgif him.. i miss him dearly when he is not around.. my daddy is bk.. not making me wasted 12 yrs time of waiting.. but then my daddy is married with another woman nx yr which making me dam upset.. i still hope tat he n my mom will gif me a complete family n a home sweet home feeling vr upset nw ):

thanks

i really wanna say thx to u, husain.. wanna thx u for helping me finding back the thanh tat i have lost few mths ago.. im not sure tat y im wan to accept u even though i still love the some1.. i vr scared of hurting u.. but when i accept u i oso vr scared tat u gonna hurt me..i still accept u coz wadeva u do or say really touch the icy heart tat i have.. but to be honest with u, i accept u coz ur personallity is quite lyk the some1.. then i realise tat u maybe the 1 tat im finding to replace the some1.. trust me pls.. i promised i wont hurt u..

starting

i has made 1st step toward my goal ytd, 6th of nov.. hope tis will go well.. idk if my choice was rite.. n i really dun wish to get hurt anymore..i had get hurt once n it was a deep hurt i really dun wan to get hurt d 2nd times.. pls dun hurt me as i really tried my best..

wad happening??

starting of the day was so tired... i was late to sku today.. it was the 2nd time tat i had late to sku T.T when i reach my MT class, i was so shock tat no 1 was in the class accept for my MT teacher.. she was tearing some paper... she ask me to sit beside her n toking to her.. she asked me some stuff tell me to b a better person n tak care of my ownself.. i sitting in the class toking to her bout 1h.. feel dam sianzz sia..then after MT still have the stupid sec sku cum n do the toking dam boring.. i almost fall asleep.. :) after the tok we went for recess.. we continue the tok for another hour.. fricking boring.. finally, can go bk to class liao.. but those boy need to stay for the tok again..wakaka :D when we go bk to the class nth to do oso... we tak those boy UNO card to play without their permission.. at 1st is kt, kh,angel,joey, jia n me r playing but then joey n jia making kt angry so she is not playing.. so left only 5 of us.. the winner is my partner kh.. then jia cum is 2nd.. after the game i then sitting n chatting wit kh.. ltr shaan cum n ask me to help him draw smth in his hand.. when i toking yo kah.. suddenly, "kah, i wan to tok to u.." joey n jia call my partner go outside of the class... i wait for kah to cum bk.. but i wait for so long nv see her cuming bk.. i decided to went to the toilet n tak a look.. then i saw jia holding on a mop.. i thought tat they were playing.. so i cry in a conner.. feel hate joey n jia tat snatch my partner away.. went i clear my tears to went bk to class.. kt asked me wad had happen then i nv say anything.. tears lyk wanna continue to roll so i ran outside of the class.. i was at 6a outside, kt ask shaan to follow me n councel me but he dunno how to start.. so he juz standing there looking at the sky.. i feel so funny.. i then crying outside of the library.. when i saw a shadow tat look lyk kah.. i tot it was my partner but it wasnt.. it is angel.. she askd me wad happen.. " i wan my partner!!!" tat is wad i reply angel.. when i cum nbk to the class, kt tell me tat kah ran somewhere n cry..my heart feel so pain now then i realised tat kah is some1 tat more importance than manting.. i ran n look for kah.. but she is no where to be seen.. i was so scare tat i gonna lost tis partner 4eva.. i heard joey say tat my partner in the 4th floor gals' toilet.. then i quickly ran there.. she is in the 2nd room of the gal toilet.. idk wad to do, so i decided to climb to the 2nd toilet room.. i get stuck at the top coz dunno where to get down.. when i get down me n kah stay in the toilet n give each another a big hug..i tell kah the reason y im crying.. to be honest wit u i dun really understand y kah is crying.. anyway, thx to tat nitemare making me noe how importance my partner is =}

the 72nd days

the time nw is 1.11 a.m n it oso the 72 days tat i have leading my life without u.. everyday not feel lyk going to sku coz i can be vr happy with my frenz but i really dunno how to face u.. i oso seem lyk dun understand the feeling.. i feel lyk cry??? feel lyk heart broken??? or maybe other feeling when i at home i wish to see u vr much but i could not face u i sku.. i dun even dare to look at u when i was walking pass u.. i pretending tat i nv saw u.. all i could do is juz look at u frm 1 conner..

im sorry

mei, i m really sorry.. tat is wad i can say to u.. i really love u n care for u but i dunno y i keep on scolding n punishing u.. may be i dunno which is the best way to show my love to u.. but wadeva i do is juz for ur own gd..pls dun blames me.. i really dun wan u to follow my step.. being a gangster or wadeva.. ppl around u will look down on u n hate u.. i really dun wan all tat to happen to u.. i wan train u to be gd since young.. pls forgive me :-(

rain

you say you love rain but you open umbrella when it rain you say you love me but you walk away when i need you you say you need me but you will walk away when you no need me you say you wont forget me but you cannot remember me after sometime you say you miss my voice but you never answer my call is that really the way you show your love to me???

y cant i??

i was chatting with honey nw... but my mine was thinking of smth else.. i was thinking of him.. i really 1 to forget him.. but i dk the reason y i love him even deeper.. i love him even deeper than i wad i had thought i always act lyk im vr happy n lively.. act tat i can go on vr well without him.. but no1 noe tat my heart was broken.. i say i will for get him but i could not make it.. nw then i noe, say is easier but so hard to do make it.. m i the most stupid gal in the world???i noe vr well tat we r imposible to be together but i still cant let it go.. i noe vr well tat i have 0% to be with him but i still dream to be with him.. i really really vr stubborn n stupid.. if time turn bk i think i will still choose to love him.. maybe love even deper than nw

feeling down

i was alone in the room nw.. suddenly my mind started to think of u while i was staring at the beautiful sky.. the cloud was so white n it mixed with light blue.. making my heart feel warm.. i really vr tired of living in a life tat without u.. it really vr terrible. it lyk leading me to hell.. the day was seem vr long to me without u in my life.. the smile appear lesser on my face but those hot tears lyk burning deeply in my eyes.. making me could not hold bk my tears.. finally, it rolling down on my cheek juz lyk how the rain is fall u juz lyk my guardian angel tat leading me to somewhere tat is safe.. u was gently guide me with a warm n loving hands tat are strong n steady.. giving my filled with dream n hope.. u make my life more meaningful.. i hope u will walk closer n closer to my side.. my fate is to love u n care for u but my fate is could not be with u.. i thought tat time could make me forget u but it did'nt.. it prove how much i've love u n care for u.. n wan u to stay at my side.. i noe no matter wad i do, u not going to turn bk to my life but at least i put in my heart n soul, even my effort to making u to turn bk to my life.. but i still hope tat in 1 day u going to bring my happiness my smile n my laughter bk.. take away those painful memmories n suffering tat i have.. no matter wad u still the 1 tat i love the most.. i really tried my best to let u go but my heart n my mind coult not let u go.. but trust me wadeva i do nw will touch ur heart 1 day.. i dun care how long must i wait.. but i noe the day will cum.. wait for the day tat u going to bring the clear blue sky into my life.. chase away those dark clouds around me..

the feeling

suddenly i have a vr uncountable feeling cumming frm bottom of my heart... hot tears is burning my eyes... i could not control it so juz let it to rolling down on my cheek... wonder wad happen to me.. y all of the sudden i had tis kind of feeling.. jus then i think of wad i had promised him.. i noe vr well tat i will going to break the promised tat i had make... but i get force to promise it... i really wan to keep my promised tat i have make to u... but it really hard to keep the promised coz i could not forget u.. dun force me to forget u n give up in u... coz u r my only hope in tis world... pls dun stoping me frm loving u... coz i noe i could not make it... really vr sry to say tat... but make me being so lost in tis society.. leaving me alone wit the hope tat continue to love u...

pic tat we going out today

kaiting and kah hui

mie and my partner angeline

is behind us :)

kaiting help us to tok

tis pic...

joey and mie...

joey and angeline....

both of them hair messy

kaiting n angeline...

they both are partner

we both are partner.

mie n kah hui

tis pair is partner....

jia yi and joey

kaiting and joey...

all of us in the pic.. ^^

all of us in the pic.... kaiting is not in the pic... she

is taking the foto... joey help us take tis pic so she

is not in the pic :)

kahhui n i taking pic in

the class while mr peh is

taking smth in the staffroom

zul is my background

all of them hair is so messy...

im the 1 who taking tis pic <3

finally

finally psle is over... it all over after a long tired period of hard work is paid off... it time to relax nw... wakakakakaka....

i started to write tis post at 12.22 i was chatting with jeremy while i was writing tis post. feeling very tired after a long boring day. i could not concentrate during my tuition lesson. i was counting how long i will take to forget u totally. guess wad?! it has been 42 days without u. every of those day was seem very long to me. it long till i could even take my time to count every min or sec. i feel vr lonely in every nite. noe-ing tat u will not belong to me forever. my tears were flow as a tap of water hoping u will turn the tap off. but i noe u will not be the 1 to off the tap of my tears. i noe every thing is all my fault. it all my fault. i brought sad n terrible day to ur life n even my frenz. really sorry. i changed myself bcoz of u even thought i noe vr clear tat im happy to being myself. but so wad i was happy to being myself to live in a life without u. but when i noe-ing tat i forever cannot to be with u. then i realised no matter how much i changed to u i still a gangster gal. heart pain n tears wasted. i really vr tired to live in a life lyk tis. i really vr scared to face u. idk the reason y i could not b strong to give up u. i dun dare to face u but i only dare to look at u when u were nv notice.. i really vr tired. hoping some1 will take away all my sadness tat keep so long n so deep in my heart.

HATE

I hate where i cum from. None of them r understand me. They does not put themself in my shoe, then they will noe wad my feeling was. My life was filled with tears juz coz of u. Every day tears could stop not rolling down on my cheek. Thinking y i was born in tis kind of family. Pls dun force me any more. If u continue to force me tis way i will gone crazy vr soon. I rather die than stay in tis earth. I really vr tired to continue to live in tis world. Y the 1 who really understand me not my family members. The 1 tat really understand my feeling is my frenz. They do understand how i feel. I face the music every day. Sometimes i oso dunno the reason y i get scolded. I still keep it in my heart till today i dun even noe if they really care for me. I was the 1 who improve in every subject but oso the 1 who get scolded every day. my guardian say tat my result r terrible n it getting frm bad to worst. Then, my sis is the 1 who drop in every subject but i did not get scolded. Nw then i noe tat tis society is really very unfair. My dream is to leave tis house as fast as possible. If i have enough money i will left tis home sweet home immediately. I no need to face the music every day n no 1 will force me to study any more. I have tried my best, put in all my heart n soul in study but i still get scolded. They scolded me instead of giving me encouraging. I nw gif up in my study n my family. But there were some things tat i will nv ever gif up. It is my frenz n my lover. My frenz were the 1 giving me a lot encourage. Idk the reason y i must born in such an unfair family. Every nite i sleep so late. I sleep at 3+ or even not sleep to revising my work. I feel vr sleepy in sku. But when i reached home frm sku i wanna take a nap to get bk my energyfor studying ltr at nite. 2 days i could only sleep 4 hours but still get scolded. They force me to study n could not sleep at till psle is over. They say sentences tat make me hate the a lot. They said " It only 1 more week to psle. 1 week nv sleep will not take away ur life." Those sentences make me feel vr pain deeply inside my heart. They force me to study n study. I think b4 psle i aldr gone crazy. They expected me to study 22 hours per day n get A* for all 3 subject. I feel vr stress nw. I feel tat i wanna end my life by today. Tat could make me end all my stress, pain n suffering in my heart. I really lyk sku day vr much. I can hang out with my frenz. They help me to forget all my stress n i was vr happy when i were with them.

there are many liau zi hao in tis world but idk the reason y i only love tis special liau zi hao... idk the reason y i love him so much... many ppl asked me y did i love him... the reason tat i tell them is vr simple n a lot. i love him coz of his personality, his smile, the way he walk, the way he tok or u can say tat i lyk every thing tat he do... i thought time can make me forget him nw then i really realise time does not help me to forget him but i make me love him even deeper... i really dunno the reason y it make me love him deeper instead of forgetting him.. god can u tell me the reason y u wan me to love him?! is it really my fate born to love him?! it hard for me to forget him, wad should i do?! i really hope tat he will understand my love to him... T.T

u r not sorry

daddy, u r not sorry... not at all.. 12 yrs bk u bring tears into mom life, make her feel vr regret tat she marry u. 12 yrs later u bring tears in to mom life again. u noe she still love u waiting for juz 4 words form u. it is "dear, i am sorry". is tat too much tat she have asked from u? i dun think so. i told myself i will hate u but momy is the 1 tell me to forgive n forget wad u had done to us. i think i should not listen to her. coz it bring her lot of pain. u hurt her again n again. but she had nv ever told me. actually i wanna forgive u but u have make me feel vr disappointed. nw then i noe the reason y mommy dun let me meet u. mommy decided not to let me meet u is the rite choice. i really regret tat i have trust u n give u another chance to pay wadeva u done to us 12yrs ago. I HATE U.. the word sorry will not make us forgive u again.. coz it will not stop all the pain in mommy heart n my heart.. dun say tat we r heartless coz u r the 1 heartless. make mommy life filled wit tears. i will rmb wad u had done to us. GET OUT OF OUR PEACEFUL LIFE

im sorry

mommy, i really sorry sorry for wad i did to u. pls gif me another chance to stay at ur side n care for u. i should not let u go so far n work. i have owe u too much mom. i dun wish to hurt u. u should care for urself more. i wish i could at ur side n care for u. nw then i really noe u r the best mommy in tis world sorry, last time i used to talk bk to u n nv listen to ur advice. i promised if u cum bk all those habbit will change. i will work hard n make u proud. i will make ur dream cum true. pls dun leave me alone any more. I LOVE U MOMMY mY bEsT mOmMy EvEr

Why must I be in this situation?! Why others can have a good relation and not me?! Why must I be treated in this way?! So many whys i want to ask but no one can answer me.. Like I said I'll never forgive and forget.. Even if I die, I would bring it with me.. I would remember this.. 1 sorry is not enough, 10, 100 ,1000 or even trillion sorry not enough.. It could not solve everything.. It will not solve all the pain in heart, do you know that?!

counting down

i really dun wanna counting down anymore after psle i thought i can relax... but i cannot i noe singapore is a country tat bringing me lot of painful memmories but there oso give me a lot of sweet memmories... i really dun wanna leave tis country.. hope after psle i juz went bk my country as visiting not live there.. i really dun wanna left my frenz n the 1 tat i love the most in tis whole life..

Night fall.. Everything is covered in silent.. nothing is heard except for the sound of passed-by cars' engines, crickets.. Everyone has fallen asleep except me. Memories of the love story flashed back to my mind.. so many thing had happen..... i dunno y my mind still cannot forget him, is it coz i still love him n could not forget him. i alrd choose to let him go n will nv cling on him. but whenever i saw him the feeling is vr diff from wad i was telling myself. i feel vr uncomfortable n hoping tat the time pass faster. love is a most powerful magnet tat can pull 2 heart together. to bad tat he is a magnet n i was a non-magnetic tat y we could not be together. i should not blames him at all. coz the 1 at fault was me not him. really sorry but hope tat end of the yr i really leaving tis country n nv cuming bk.

CANNOT FORGET

I cannot be strong to face u. U may say tat i was a selfish gal but all i wan is u to stay by my side. I wan to feel ur heart beat in every min or sec. NO matter it is a sweet or bitter day, u still every thing in my heart. I really hope tat we could share our day till the end of our life and wish tat time could turn back to the day tat i still with u. The day tat it rain juz lyk how my tears is rolling. My face always filled wit smile but the pain is keep deeply in my heart and my mind. I have meet lot of boys but i had never have tis feeling towards them accept for u. If we not together, no matter how far the distance between u n me. When u sad i oso wont be able to happy. Every min or sec beside u, my heart feel vr warmth n safe. Make me forget the past n even make me stop the sad tears from rolling down my cheek. By then every thing has becum history. I wish tat i am ur shadow which can follow u every min or sec. The sky is blue mixed wit white, it so buetiful juz lyk the love story of my life. But whenver i think of tat terrible day which left only me, feel lyk wanna hate u the rest of my life. The more i say to myself tat i hate u, the more i feel lyk wanna hold u bk to my life. When the 1st time i saw u, the wind was blow vr slow in every sec. my heart beat lyk crazy n the feeling was vr unusal. Wad is tat feeling?! My mind still hear tat "i promised i will take care of u the rest of my life". From the sentence i tell myself tat i will only love u the most in my life. Whenever i think of tat sentence, it was the time tat i could not stop thinking of u. I thought tat if my life dun have u, i still can be happy but i cant. I thought tat i will slowly forget u, continue to walk the long path of road infront of me but the sweet time still there in my heart. I CANNOT FORGET IT. Even thought u think tat the 9 months is nth but to me it give me a sweet memmory tat i will not forget it in my life. I still cannot over cum the loneliness n the most painful time. But i noe it time to let it be story of my life filled with love. N the story was sweet n vr special to me.

story about a blind girl

Once, there was a blind girl. She had a feeling for a boy.. The surprised things was he love her too. One day, the girl say to the boy "When i can see the world and see the light. Hold ' your hand and stare at the moon and the star with you. Then i will marry you." Finally untill the operate day and she can see the world. The boy said to the girl " Now you can see the world. Will you marry me?!" The girl very shock when she know that the boy also blind like her last time. She does not want to marry him. He said with tear rolling down his cheek "Please take care of your eyes because it is my last present for you from me." Then he left the room without any regreting. The girl feel so touch that she follow the boy and said "sorry". They were married after that.

ice-skating

today i go katong to change my clothe then go to leasure park with my frenz.. at first i dun wanna go ice skating... i have a several reason for it.. 1st i wanna go arcade, 2nd i need go home early for tuition.. 3rd i dunno how u play... kt n her sis go in the ice skating 1st... then angeline follow them.. me n kah go shopping. we bought a exactly the same bracelet... soooo nice ^^... then go arcade change $10 into the tokens... i play half of the money... kt keep on call kh n disturb us... she wan us to join her but me nkh dun wan... at last me n kh juz join them lor T.T ....then the remaning tokens i gave it to ricky n joshua.. the last $2 gave it to joshua oso :( bo money...then when i juz steps in i saw they all skate til so pro... so, i try to balance myself. then, walk some steps forward.. finlally i can skate after several min... feel ly ice-skating juz lyk roller blade.. may be it easier than roller blade lor.. :) i teach my partner how to skate then we both hold hand n skate... even thought it the 1st time play my partner n i nv fall hehe... angeline cry coz she noe how to skate but she forget... when i skate with her she hold me vr tight till my hand red red sia T.T .... i so poor thing... even thought i get scolded but at least i have a fun day wit my fren..

wad am i thinking nw?!

i noe tat 3 words 'i love you' is vr easy to say n everyone can say it... but so many ppl say it but does not mean it... if those ppl could not mean it then y must they say it to hurt other? no1 will truely understand my feeling unless u walk in my shoes n suffer the same pain... then u truely noe how many suffer tat i have to face everyday... the sky is endless, my pain will oso endless?! i really dunno how to face all this suffer... all i do is juz run away from all those problem... i can only noe how to stay in the dark by myself n cry all i wan...

i feel

i feel tat i should not enter tis world... i hate tis world coz it bring me lot of suffer n tis suffer will forever stay deeply in my heart... i must bring it every where i go... i really hate tis world... i have th in tis world nw... i young i must stay with my cousin n missed my mom damn lot... i lose the person tat i love the most in tis world n nw i could not keep a simple frenship... i feel tat i vr useless person in tis society... if i not born into tis world all tis will not be happen... how long should i be suffering?! MY FRENSHIP JUZ LYK TAT OVER??? hopefully not...

today is his b'day... i hope tat his wish will cum true.. hope tat i not the 1st 1 to say happy b'day but the 1 is manting.. i think tat make him more happy..i really hope tat tis yrs will be his most unforgetable b'day ever.. gd luck 12 yrs old boy..

todae i have chinese listening compre i juz dun care bout it n sleep during the test but i still can pass haha... pro.. when i sleep my chinese teacher nv scolded me..the idiot junaid say rubbish sia.. keep on disturb me non stop... say wad brandan chan, then thanh thanh chan... wad rubbish?! i hate it damn lot sia.. nth i could do to make him stop..anger till make me sick liao las... have fever, make me cannot shout n i oso have running nose some more but i will try my best to cum to sku... coz i wanna gif some1 present in personal... hopefully i will not wake up late tml... good luck my fren...

to husain

sorry tat i have break my promised to you... but i really coud not control myself.. i promised myself i will forget him and i will not wasted any more tears on him.. but i juz cry and think of him... i really dun wan to break my promised toward you and myself.... i noe u only wanna care for me... but sorry tat i had made you disappointed... i really sorry...

letter to some1

To my love,

I really don't know what to say or do to make you turn back to my life. Like the first time you asked to stead me. I know you need to concentrate on your study now, so I will wait for you. Days had been passed, my love to you still there and it will never change. All I could say is I love you deeper and even deeper when the next day come. I will never ever forget you in my life. I will cut myself whenever i start to think about you. I rather suffering all the pain on my hand than keep it inside my heart. I will promised you that I will not disturb your life any more. I will love and care for you silently. I hate and angry myself, why should I love you so much. I will started to cry whenever I saw you walking along the corridor. I really could not control my tears from rolling down my cheek. I will cry until the day that I could totally forget you. Hope that one day I could forget you and the day will come soon. All I want to do now is knock my head onto the wall and forget every things when i woke up. I think that is the fastest way that i could forget you. You are the first boy that could wasted my tears. I really missed your smile and your voice. There is no word to describe my love to you. I will try my very best to let you go and never ever think of you again. I think I could not do that because I still deeply in love with you and hoping that one day you will come back to my side. Can you please stop ignoring me and treat me as your friend?! You are the only person that I could trust and depend on. You are the one who saved me out of the terrible nightmare and the one bright up my life. I don't care what happen in this world or around me. I only wanted to care for you. I really need you to stay by my side, care for me and be there for me whenever I need you. I really wanted to hold you tightly in my arm. Sorry that my action is pushing you away from me. Please come back to my life. How I wish I could exchange my heart with you. To let you know how much I have been love you, need you and care for you. No one could truly understand my pain and suffering deeply inside my heart. When I know that you going to leave me for one reason. My heart feel very pain and then I know my heart going to broke into pieces. I know it all my fault. I don't understand why you could not forgive me and give me another chance. I know you don't want this to happen at all. You are felling equally sad as how I do, am I right? May be I don't really understand what exactly inside your mind. But I will never give up on you and I will support you. I really hope that you can win your new crush heart. I think break up is the best way out for both of us. So that you could find your true happiness. Love is all around you, try to receive it because when it go you will never ever find it back. I will love you and willing to wait for you forever. Your named will stayed deeply inside my heart and it will not be erased. Love you a lot.

Yours Regards,

Thanh Thanh

suspend

today norman, joshua and ricky cry juz coz of me, kh n kt make them into trouble... i really sorry... i noe u all dun wanna tell mr chua bout us... how silly are u all... tell mr chua bout us n we will in tis together... me. kt n kh will look for mr chua tml... wanna tell him wad had been happen... i dun mind if i get suspend i rather let mr chua suspend or canning me than all those 6A ppl..

todae i saw him in the sku library...

feel lyk wanna gif him a big hug but

think again im nth to him.. so i must

control myself... lucky juz nw i manage

to control my tears... n stoping the tears

to roll down my cheek... he is the 1st boi

tat make me wasted lot of tears... there

is no word to discript how much i love

him... n the love will forever stay deeply

in my heart... i cut myself to make me

stop thinking bout him n make me wake

up... he is not belong to me lyk the olden

day... cannot forget the time we spent

together...

asking urself

nw then i really noe how selfish is my mother... y she should not let me meet my father once last time... may be it could make me feel better n stop wondering how my daddy look lyk.. i really dun wan to continue to wonder who is my dad any more.. wheneva my fren asked me where is my dad.. wad did u expecting me to ans?? i really hate tis feeling... i jealous of those who have parent stay bside them n tok care for them...i really have nth left in tis world accept for hope.. i still hope tat tis 12 yrs i've not wasting any effort.. i've been waiting for a home sweet home... i dun wan any other to call me fatherless... i really hate to hear it.. my tear is started to rolling down my cheek wheneva i heard some1 called "daddy"... i really wish tat 1 day i could call my dad "daddy"... i juz lyk other gal hoping life will feel with happiness but y my life is oni feel wit sadness... all tis yrs i've been lonely n i really trust oni jeremy... he is the 1 i love the most in tis life... even though i noe tat he will nv belong to me.. my heart is really broken... with a feeling tat cannot be descript... who will noe tis feeling?! accept for jeremy who could i trust?? i really dunno how to face ppl around me... i hate tis fucking world

wad i wan tel u

although i noe tat i vr selfish but i only wan to keep u by my side... nw then noe love a person not mean tat u must b wit him.. so, i will let him go.. let him find his true happiness... if i really love him i will b able to b happy if he is happy... but i will nv gif up on him... i will wait till he really no tat im the oni 1 who really willing to wait for him the rest of my life... juz wanna hear "pls waiting for me"... i'll do it... nw i juz wan him 2 go ahead n walk toward his goals. i will always behind him n support him.. dun listen to wad ppl around u... follow ur heart n do wadeva u wanna do coz life is vr short.. i wan u to be happy n not stay beside me n hate my wit all core... all i wan from u is accept my gift for u n treated me as ur best fren..

if time can turn bk

i promised i will not

be gangster... when

i was young i always

get bullied by those

big size boi & gal.. frm

then onward i tell mysef

not to let any1 bully any

more... nw, no1 dare to

bully me or hurt me.. but

i really regret of wad i doin

no1 can hurt me accept for

him.. is norman they all say

is the true?? it not my fault??

did he really change into

another person?? who can ans

me all tis q? maybe i dun really

understand him all.. if time can

turn bk i will not start tis

relationship coz it really bring both

of us to bcum enemy... i dun believe

tat till nw i still trusted him.. anyway,

i wanna thank norman, joshua, ricky,

kaitng & kahhui... thanks for stop me

from doing stupid ting but it better

than let me continue wit tis pain... i oso

dun understand y god torture me tis way

i really cannot forget all those happy time

& sweet memmorise... i really wanna bang

me head into the wall.. tml wake up forget

bout the pass continue wit my nw life.. ppl

say love is blind & painful but i dun believe

it... nw then i noe it is true, i still thought tat

love always end wit beautiful memmorise..

birthday

yesterday i celebrate my auntie birthday at sakura restaurant.. all the japanese food tat nv cook i dun even dare to touch.. those food look vr disgusting sia.. today, i wanna celebrate my partner birthday with her but i cannot go out.. any way my partner oso cannot go out lyk me.. tml is national day.. how i celebrate national day?? easy, at home doing homework.. ~~~~~sianzz sia~~~~~.. them monday is my friend b'day again.. guess who?? aiyoyo it my sku-mate.. the 1 last year same sku as me but nw went bk taiwan liao.. it manson lor

is tis the fact???

if u does not love me anymore juz leave me alone in the pain by myself.. if u really wanna hurt me by making me fall even more deeply in love with u... if u does not love me anymore juz turn and walked away... i dun wanna make u suffered with me... the fault is mine, mine fault is nv hold u bk when u leave... if u does not love me anymore dun force urslef to be wit me juz leave and i will find some1 else even though they does not love me from the bottom of their heart.. but it better than make u suffering the pain with me... juz let 1 person feel the pain better than both in the pain

wad money can do???

money can buy big house but cannot buy warm family money can buy watch/ clock but it cannot buy the time that had passed money can buy friend but they will not be there for u money can buy ur crushed heart but cannot buy the true love from them money can buy medicine but cannot buy ur health so money is nothing dun work too hard juz becoz u wanted lot of money